Church Expels New Bride for Refusing to Consummate Marriage, Husband Alleges Coercion

An Abuja-based church, Holiness Revival Movement Worldwide, has expelled a newly married woman, Oyiza, from its congregation for allegedly refusing to consummate her marriage with her husband, Isaac.

The couple, who were based in Ibadan, Oyo State, tied the knot on September 6, 2025, after completing traditional rites in Okene, Kogi State, and a court wedding in Ibadan.

However, shortly after the ceremony, the marriage ran into crisis as the bride allegedly resisted her husband’s attempts at intimacy, insisting she did not love him. She reportedly accused her mother of coercing her into the union.

Harmattan News  gathered that repeated efforts by both families and church leaders to mediate failed, as the bride remained adamant.

In a video posted on the church’s YouTube channel in February, the International Director of the movement, Pastor Paul Rika, announced Oyiza’s expulsion after five months of failed mediation.

During the announcement, he described her as a “demon” and declared that she must be punished. While accusing her of spiritism, he urged members to pray for her “destruction,” alleging that she had brought shame to the assembly.

“So, we have delivered her to Satan. We have expelled, excommunicated her. You want to bring shame, what do you mean that you don’t love Isaac?” he queried.

The cleric referenced cultural practices of earlier times when weeping new brides were compelled to go to their husbands’ homes.

“Even the harlots, do they sleep with those that love them? It’s business. So, how do you say you don’t love Isaac after accepting him, and you say you don’t love? Demon!” he added.

Husband’s Account

Isaac explained that Oyiza initially consented when he expressed his intention to marry her, leading the church’s marriage committee to approve wedding preparations.

However, he said some months before the ceremony, Oyiza began expressing doubts and indicated she was no longer interested because she had lost feelings for him.

“(I) thought this could be spiritual and we should pray. The marriage committee also counselled her to go and pray. She returned and said she was convinced and that was how we proceeded,” he added.

According to him, the marriage was formalised after the completion of traditional rites and the court wedding.

Harmattan news saw Facebook photos of the couple showing Oyiza appearing happy while surrounded by friends and church members.

But Isaac said the situation deteriorated almost immediately after the wedding.

“After the wedding, she started complaining again that she no longer had feelings for me. She had also started misbehaving, but because of the fervent love I had for her, I accommodated her deficiencies and lapses, thinking that things will change,” he said.

He recounted that on their wedding night at a hotel, she asked him to wait, offering no cogent reason. She also reportedly said she did not like sex all the time.

Isaac said they agreed to wait until they got to Ibadan.

However, at the park where they went to see her off, she broke down in tears, telling her mother: “Mummy, can you see now, when I said I don’t love this man, can you see it now. See the condition you pushed me into now.”

Isaac said his in-laws pleaded with him to exercise patience and keep the matter private.

When the problem persisted, he reported to a church leader in Lokoja before escalating it to his pastor in Ibadan. Despite interventions, including counselling sessions where his wife reportedly broke down in tears, Oyiza remained resolute.

“She would tell me almost every time, ‘No love, no joy, no peace,'” he stated, adding that he became more confused and distressed as he had great love for her.

He further alleged that she accused him of attempted rape whenever he sought intimacy.

“It was a battle. Sometimes, she would just open up herself and say, ‘Do whatever you want to do.’ But I did not also know all these things.”

Isaac said counselling sessions organised by the church, including sexual guidance and support, yielded no positive result.

“It’s not just about sex. Even bathing. She said she loved me to bath at night. I bath virtually all night. But sometimes, if I don’t bath, she would hold my neck, telling me to go and bath. She would force me. Our leaders would intervene, asking her to release herself, but she refused,” he alleged.

He described the marriage as suffocating.

“If I came back from work, to sit on the dining table, she would say no. I was not even free until I bathed and changed my clothes. It was a struggle,” he added.

Oyiza was not in church to respond to the claims and allegations levelled against her by Isaac. Efforts by our correspondent to contact her were also abortive.

Church Leader’s Revelation

Before the expulsion decision was announced, Pastor Rika claimed his wife had a revelation that Oyiza was “a marine girl who is married to a marine demon and they have children together.”

He further stated that “this demon is a harsh type, highly jealous type that will never allow her marry another, and the covenant with the demon is that the day you allow a man enter into you, you will die, or that man will die.”

Expert Opinions

However, mental health professionals who spoke with Harmattan news pointed to possible psychological and medical factors.

Clinical psychologist Oluwakemi Akintoyese said a range of issues could explain the woman’s behaviour, including parental pressure or medical conditions such as vaginismus.

“Maybe she was forced into the marriage through parental pressure. So, she’s saying, ‘Oh, yes, you guys can force me to get married, but you cannot force me to have anything to do with him.’ That could also be another explanation,” she said.

She added: “We also have some medical conditions or reasons why people will not want to have sex. But at least, the most common one that I know of is vaginismus. So, that is one.”

Another psychologist, Afolabi Aroyehun, attributed the situation to gametophobia the fear of sex.

“A lot of things can make people afraid of sex. Upbringing is one of such issues. Past experience is another thing. Some of them have very terrible childhood traumatic experiences. They have been abused; sexual and psychological abuse,” he said.

A marriage counsellor, Sunday Anani, said love is a critical foundation of any union.

“Sex is an emotional thing. It’s physical, but before the physical comes to bear, there’s first of all an emotional, heart connection. When there is no heart connection between two people, it is difficult, probably impossible, for both of them to agree that sex should happen,” he explained.

He also questioned why Isaac proceeded with the marriage after the lady expressed her disinterest in sex.

“She already said she won’t want sex. If a woman already told you she would not like sex or she doesn’t want it, why are you going ahead to marry such a person?” he added.

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